Monday, November 28, 2011

Please Listen

Depression is a tricky thing. Not only for the one suffering from it, but from the loved ones that want to be there to help. Yes I get it. You may be thinking "how can we just stand by while you wallow in pain? I've read all these books and know all these things so if you do this, or try this, or don't this, then you'll be fine!!"

No it doesn't quiet work that way.

My advice to you well intentioned friends and family is to STOP! Don't try to fix things, because you can't. Really. Just shut up and listen!

And if you still don't get this poem below. It explains it best.


Please Listen

When I ask you to listen to me
and you start giving advice,
you have not done what I asked
nor heard what I need.

When I ask you to listen to me
and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that way,
you are trampling on my feelings.

When I ask you to listen to me
and you feel you have to do something to solve my problems,
you have failed me -- strange as that may seem.

Listen, please!
All I asked was that you listen.
Not talk nor "do"—just hear me.
Advice is cheap.
A quarter gets both "Dear Abby" and astrological forecasts
in the same newspaper.
That I can do for myself. I'm not helpless.
Maybe discouraged and faltering -- but not helpless.

When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself,
you contribute to me seeming fearful and weak.

But when you accept as a simple fact that I do feel what I feel,
no matter how seemingly irrational, then I can quit trying to
convince you and get about to understanding what's behind
what I am saying and doing -- to what I am feeling.

When that's clear, chances are so will the answers be, and I won't need any advice. (Or then, I'll be able to hear it!)

Perhaps that's why, for some people, prayer works, because God is mute, and doesn't give advice or try to fix what we must take care of ourselves

So, please listen and just hear me.

And if you want to talk, let's plan for your turn, and I promise I'll listen to you.

— Anonymous

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Like Crazy

Thanks to Calgary International Film Festival, I got the privilege to watch the advance screening of "Like Crazy". It's a film about long distance relationships and it's highs and lows.

Watching this movie made me think of how much a coward I was for giving up so easily when I was in this situation. On the other hand, it gave me some peace knowing that I wasn't the only one. Love is already complicated enough. Adding the complexity of living miles apart, the jealousy and mistrust, the worry, the longing and everything else is a lot for a young person to have to go through. I highly commend couples who have and are making this type of relationship work.

If you liked Blue Valentine, then I suggest watching this movie.

And to you my dear friend who has taught me so much, wherever you may be, I wish you much happiness and bliss with your other half :) Thank you for showing me patience and resilience.

Monday, November 14, 2011

Social Media Madness!

Great news! I finally have a smartphone w/ a data plan!!! I am switching from my BlackBerry that was lovingly dubbed "pinkberry" and am now sporting a Nexus S google phone as my new "sidekick". As much as I love my BB and the fact that it's Canadian made, Nexus S (to be named..) and I are quickly forming a steamy relationship that should hopefully go beyond infatuation.

Another great news: After 4+ years of putting up with Rogers and all their hassles and down right theiving, I've switched over to Mobilicity (link for info below), a smaller carrier.

Pros = Unlimited EVERYTHING!! including long North America wide long distance.
Cons = Very limited towers

With Mobilicity's no contract policy, I can switch over to one of the big 3 again, probably with my tail between my legs, but let's hope and pray that won't be the case ^_^

And with this new sidekick, I can finally have the internet w/ me ALL the time. Real time information needed from movie times to news to Facebook is only a click away anytime, anywhere! Aaack!!!

In addition, guess who's now back on Twitter? Thank goodness for Seesmic app (link for info below) that manages both FB and Twitter very efficiently. A twitter box has been added that shows real time tweets.

It feels so great to have social media work to my advantage and to be in the know of what's happening right away. Let's just hope it doesn't become an addiction. Too much anyway :p

As mentioned in post:

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